Everyone wants a promotion.

CEOs want to create a bigger, more profitable company. Senior executives want a bigger voice in strategic decisions. Coaches and consultants want to make a bigger impact and charge more.

Here’s the [...]]]> In the past couple of weeks, a theme has emerged as I’ve had conversations with a variety of individuals.

Everyone wants a promotion.

CEOs want to create a bigger, more profitable company. Senior executives want a bigger voice in strategic decisions. Coaches and consultants want to make a bigger impact and charge more.

Here’s the core problem. Everyone is either waiting for someone else to promote them or waiting for permission. The attitude is, when they recognize me and promote me, I’ll step up and bring the value that I know I can deliver. Until then, I’m going to operate at my current level (and complain about it).

I’ve been self-employed now for over 8 years. Who do I ask for a promotion?

And here’s the worst part. When I get passed over for a promotion, who do I blame? Wow, that Ron guy, what a jerk – he totally is missing out on my value. Oh wait, that’s me.

Here’s the secret: PROMOTE YOURSELF. RIGHT NOW.

SELF-PROMOTION, not as in shameless, hype-filled marketing, but as in ELEVATING YOUR GAME.

Here’s a quick story to illustrate.

I’ve been training in the martial arts for six years now. Like many students, I dreamed about eventually getting a black belt. Yet about two years into my training I made a very important decision – not to “get” a black belt, as if I’m collecting trinkets from a gumball machine.

Instead, I made a decision to “BE” a black belt, starting right then and there. I remember the moment, standing in line at the end of class one night. I was smack in the middle of the line with about half the students ranked above and half below me. The current black belt holders stood in the front along with our master.

My entire approach to training changed that night. Actually, my entire approach to life. Why? Because I started approaching my training from a completely different level of consciousness and intention. I started paying very close attention to the black belt holders in front of me. Who is this person being on the mat? Who is this person being in life? I began working very intentionally to show up from this place.

Of course, from where I was at my then current level of awareness (blue belt), I had to somewhat guess at the level of awareness that a black belt is bringing to their training. But simply asking the question puts you on a different path.

I was officially promoted to black belt in Ki Bon Sool about three years later, after five years of training in a combination of Hapkido, Tai Chi, Jiu Jitsu, and weapons skills, culminating in a grueling “heck week” test which involved five consecutive days of testing.

Master Michael Macario with Ron Wilder on “official” promotion day, May 14, 2011. Special thanks to Master Michael Macario.

Here’s the key point. The official promotion came much later than my internal promotion. The promotion itself is really just a formality – recognition that you’ve demonstrated what it takes to operate at that level. Then you are ready for your next stage of growth.

But wait – shouldn’t I get promoted first and then I’ll step up and do the work? Doesn’t work that way. The money, rewards, and recognition always come later.

NO ONE IS GOING TO GIVE YOU PERMISSION TO STEP UP. It doesn’t matter if you are an individual contributor or the CEO. And it is especially true if you are self-employed and running your own business. You must promote yourself – from within.

So if you are eager to get to the next level but are stuck, don’t ask “what do I do?” Ask yourself “who do I need to be?”

How much more awareness and intention can I bring to the work I’m doing RIGHT NOW?

Want to grow your company? Start BEING the CEO of the bigger, more profitable company NOW.

Want a seat at the strategy table? Start thinking bigger and more strategically NOW.

Want to raise your fees and make a bigger impact? Start playing bigger NOW.
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I am privileged to be working with some remarkable individuals who are stepping up to create big things in their worlds and who recognize how working with a great coach is accelerating their success. If you are ready to make self-promotion a reality in your life, contact me and we’ll have a conversation.

What would self-promotion look like for you?  Comment below.

When I was leaving Tucson, the most incredible thing [...]]]> I spent a couple of days last week in Tucson teaching at Steve Chandler’s Coaching Prosperity School.  The entire two days were focused on client creation – working with coaches to develop the skillset and mindset required to serve clients at a very high level.

When I was leaving Tucson, the most incredible thing happened.

I went to the automated kiosk to check in for my flight.  After the kiosk found my itinerary, a screen came up:

Would you like to purchase additional frequent flier miles for $25?

I thought, no, I don’t really want that.

But when I pushed the button for “Decline Offer”, the system crashed!!!!

A blue screen came up, and then an icon of a sad face with tears pouring down it.

The message said, “Sorry, I am dealing with the incredible pain of your rejection.  Give me a minute to pull myself together.”

WOW, I thought.  Maybe I can do a little coaching session with this kiosk right here on the spot to make it feel better.

Actually, that didn’t happen.

What happened?

On the very NEXT screen was another offer.  “Would you like to pay $9 to be in the first boarding group?”

No, thank you.  Again I pushed “Decline offer.”

The kiosk completed my check-in and printed out my boarding pass.

I reached down to collect my laptop bag and my luggage to bring to the counter.  By the time I looked up, the kiosk had already moved on to the next screen – ready to start the process again with the NEXT passenger.

The lesson for me in my own coaching practice is to simply make the NEXT offer.   I notice a pattern where I make one offer, the person says no for whatever reason, and then I drop it and move on to the next person.

But what if I created something else to offer this person?

Would you like something else?

Yes? No?

NEXT!

What I love about the kiosk is that the offer is simply an offer.  And your YES or NO is simply data that it responds to – it doesn’t interpret your response or spend even a second processing its own feelings (it doesn’t have any) about your response.  It just moves on to the next screen and the next offer.

I know what you’re thinking.  “But I’m not a machine and my customer is not a machine.”  The point is not to become robotic and lifeless.

The point is to get creative and simply keep moving.

What about you?  Are you ready with a next offer when someone turns down your first offer?  If not, are you losing opportunities – and clients – to a too rigid and limited approach to serving your clients?

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Leave your answer in the comments section below – or submit a question about your biggest client creation challenge by clicking here: Ask Ron.

What’s the difference between a Big A Agenda and a little a agenda? How do you use both as a leader?

If your leadership team is not working as effectively as you’d like, one place to look is the effectiveness of your meetings. And to have effective meetings, you need to [...]]]>

What’s the difference between a Big A Agenda and a little a agenda? How do you use both as a leader?

If your leadership team is not working as effectively as you’d like, one place to look is the effectiveness of your meetings. And to have effective meetings, you need to have a good agenda. As the leader, you want to think about your agenda at two levels: your Agenda with a big A and your agenda with a little a.

The Big Agenda communicates the major strategic goals for your organization. Your Big Agenda tells a story about who we are and where we are going. The initiatives in your Big Agenda will require your focus over the course of a year or more.

By comparison, the little agenda is like a more conventional meeting agenda. What do you want to accomplish in the next hour? What are the specific outcomes or decisions you want to make? The Big Agenda is macro; the little agenda is micro.

In my experience, most executive leaders have a preference for either Big A or little a. They lean heavily to one or the other. Here’s the problem – if your style is all Big A, with no little a, people will be inspired at first but then frustrated. They will want clarity – plus direction and action.

However, if your style is all little agenda with no Big Agenda, people will wonder why they are doing the work in the first place.  They want context and to know that what they are doing ultimately matters.

The worst case is the frazzled and weak leader who tends to neglect both the Big Agenda and the little agendas. They do not clearly communicate the big story nor do they guide their team to chunk it down into concrete steps.

When you put both A/agendas together you have a very powerful package – a Big Agenda that tells an inspiring story about who we are and where we are going, combined with a series of little agendas that lead us step by step towards the realization of the vision. So the great executive must develop skills as a   strategic storyteller and as a masterful teacher and facilitator of his or her team.  Bringing the Big Agenda and the little agendas together requires prep time, focus, and practice.

So how about you? What’s your Big Agenda? And how are you lining up your little agendas to support the Big Agenda?

Whether and how you prepare yourself to lead “what’s next” makes a huge difference in your effectiveness as a leader. You [...]]]> If you are a leader, “What’s next?” is what people want to know from you. People are looking to you – not necessarily for the specific answer, but to set a direction and agenda.

Whether and how you prepare yourself to lead “what’s next” makes a huge difference in your effectiveness as a leader. You need to be early and out front, ready to go.

Photo credit: Ron Wilder, from the flight deck of the USS Theodore Roosevelt (CVN-71) in 1991

I first noticed this powerful concept at age nineteen while I was at boot camp in the United States Navy in San Diego.

Navy boot camp was a well-oiled machine. We got off the bus as raw recruits on Day 1 and eight weeks later we graduated as fleet-ready sailors. Every moment in between for us was scheduled down to the minute to accomplish this transformation.

Each day, after our early morning inspections and breakfast, we would march around to the location of the first training “evolution” for the day, and then progress through a series of “evolutions” until the day was done.

In the military, “evolution” is the term used to define a particular activity. The instructor would address us by saying “In this next evolution, you are going to learn how to properly make your bunk.” (Or fire a weapon – or don your gas mask – or whatever the objective happened to be.) The leader of that particular evolution had an objective they would accomplish with us in a specific period of time. They’d show up, they were ready to go, and they taught us.

We had two drill instructors who led our company of eighty men during the entire course of boot camp. These two chief petty officers were with us from the moment we got off the bus in San Diego to the moment we graduated. They  led us through most of the evolutions that occurred in the barracks and taught us how to march in formation, salute appropriately, and to master the basics of military discipline and attention to detail.

What I found remarkable was how these two men, our leaders, were always early and always ready. I never saw one of them show up late or come rushing up at the last minute. I never saw them out of full uniform at any time. I never saw these officers out of character in terms of who they were supposed to be – models for us. They did have their own private room and office in the back of the barracks, but it was off limits. Whenever they were in front of us, they were on their game – always ready to model behavior and lead the next evolution. If we had something that was going to start at a particular time, they were ready 10 minutes early without fail, every single time.

So as a leader, are you ready to lead the “next evolution” in your organization? Have you thought clearly about the objective of the next interaction with your people? Is your objective to make a decision, to reengineer a process, to brainstorm and innovate?  Have you thought through how this objective will be achieved?

If you are the leader, you must be ready and prepared to lead the next evolution. You must take the time to prepare, to be thoughtful about the next step or the next moment with a clear purpose of what is going to happen next – and then be early – not running things at the last minute. Are you relaxed and ready to go? Do you have enough time and space in your schedule dedicated to figuring out “what’s next”?

Too many “leaders” are not intentional about being ready to lead the next evolution. Over the years of working in a variety of organizations, I always find it troubling when I see a business leader show up late to meetings. Sometimes they are actually late – other times they are frenzied or harried. But they’re the leader! Their people are sitting around the conference table, wondering when their leader is going to show up and what they are supposed to do.

I learned in boot camp the power of leaders who show up early and relaxed yet alert – as compared to late and frenzied. It’s completely different in terms of what they convey to their people. How can anyone lead somebody if they’re not even clear about being ready to go?

If you’re going to lead a group of people through something, you need to be ready and early – before anyone else even shows up.

As you progress into more and more senior leadership roles, you must devote creative time, space, and energy to defining the next evolution. Your people are counting on you.

So what’s your next evolution? Are you ready to lead it?

“Pie in the sky” is an expression used to refer to a sham promise or to any prospect of future happiness which is unlikely ever to [...]]]> A coaching client recently started off a call with “Well, I’ve got this ‘pie in the sky’ idea.”  She sounded really flat and dejected.

“Pie in the sky” is an expression used to refer to a sham promise or to any prospect of future happiness which is unlikely ever to be realized.

The phrase was first documented in an early 20^th century folk song from the labor movement, which said ““Work and pray, live on hay. You’ll get pie in the sky when you die.”

In other words, your suffering here on earth will be rewarded in heaven. But life on earth is still pretty miserable. No wonder she sounded so dejected.

“Great, I love pie in the sky ideas. Let’s hear it.”

Really?

“Sure. Bring it on.”

She then described an idea for her business and the desire for technology that would implement certain functions to connect with her customers.

Two very interesting things happened in the course of our conversation.

First, we discovered that many aspects of her idea were not unrealistic at all. In fact, they were all simple fixes that could be implemented now, based on existing technologies, with a minimal investment. While I didn’t know exactly how to do this, I could immediately think of a dozen people she could talk to who could help her figure it out. She was blown away by the realization that the solution to her problem was so readily available.

When we have specialized knowledge, we know a lot about certain things. But there is so much that we don’t know. (For a great example, check out Nassim Taleb’s book, Black Swan. He tells a story about Umberto Eco’s collection of unread books. He called it his antilibrary – what we know we don’t know – which at some point becomes much larger than our actual library of what we do know.)

To help my client understand this concept, I asked her a vague question about something I knew was in her domain of expertise. She immediately came up with several ideas, resources, and people to call. I pointed this out to her. “See how what is pie in the sky to me is an easy solution for you? See how it is quickly brought down to earth in the here and now once you connect to other people?”

So verbalize your pie in the sky idea to a few people. You may find that it is easily accomplished via existing methods or technologies you simply didn’t know about, but they do.

Second, we found that the qualities of the pie in the sky desires are illuminating and insightful. Here’s what I mean. After we sorted out a few technical options for her to pursue, I asked the following question:

“Let’s imagine that the pie in the sky solution existed right now. What benefits or qualities would it bring to your life and business?” She listed a few things, but the big ones were simplicity and elegance.

“Ok, so those qualities are what you are really after, right?”

Yes, it’s not just about the technology.

“So if there were other ways to bring those qualities into your life and business, would that appeal to you?”

Absolutely!

“So how could we get those qualities into your life right now?”

We spent the rest of our session brainstorming actions she could take to bring simplicity and elegance into her business and life. Most of them had nothing to do with technology and required no monetary investment. They did however require clearing out some commitments and having conversations with certain key people in her life.

So what’s the power of a “pie in the sky” idea? From this experience, we figured out a pie in the sky idea may not be impossible after all. It may take some work, time, and money to implement, but it is certainly doable. And in the meantime, the qualities that the pie in the sky idea would bring into your life can be brought into reality right now in other ways.

If you are a leader, have a pie in the sky session. Ask a bunch of your people their pie in the sky ideas about your business. What is it that they fantasize about yet think is impossible? You may find that some of these ideas could actually be implemented relatively easily and identify bigger possibilities that you can tap into right now.

By the way, suppose you start talking to people about your pie in the sky idea. After following this trail, you discover that there is no existing solution available using current technology. Guess what? You may have discovered a big business opportunity.

If you are a coach/consultant, ask your clients about their pie in the sky ideas. Ask them “What’s something that you’ve been kicking around, dreaming about – which you’d consider pie in the sky – completely impossible. Tell me about that. Let’s see if we can bring those qualities into the present.”

And don’t forget to ask yourself, too. “So what’s your pie in the sky idea?”

Bring it on!

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Have a question about business, leadership, sales, economics, entrepreneurship, coaching, or your success?

Send me your questions (Click Here) and I will answer as many as I can in my blog and newsletter.

Our enrollment conversations are likely the first substantial experience our potential clients have with [...]]]> One of Steve Chandler’s 18 Disciplines for enrolling coaching clients is to “sell the experience, not the concept.” Rather than abstractly describe what you do, actually do it so that the client’s decision is to “continue, not to start.”

Our enrollment conversations are likely the first substantial experience our potential clients have with us. Of course we want them to be positive. But be aware that positive does not mean pleasant.

Positive means moving the client in the direction of their true goals – their heart’s desire. And of course it always means being professional, respectful, compassionate, and service-oriented. But positive in this context generally requires that we raise the client’s tension level – which very often is unpleasant for them. Unpleasant, yet ultimately in service to them.

Early in my coaching career I conducted many enrollment conversations that were pleasant and even filled with energy and enthusiasm. Sometimes that energy and enthusiasm carried the day and the client signed on – but many times they did not. I spent hours wondering why this was the case.

As I’ve learned through extensive study, my own coaches, and trial and error – the enrollment conversation actually must be unpleasant for the client. It is essential to raise the client’s tension level so that they really experience the gap between where they are and where they want to be. The future consequences of their current path must be brought into the present. It is not enough to discover the client’s pain – you actually have to magnify it so that they can really see it – and from there help the client generate the commitment to change it. Without this level of tension – which is not pleasant for the client – the commitment to work with you is usually not there.

Raising this kind of tension is a skill and an art that must be mastered. It is not about a script or merely asking certain questions, although that is part of it. It is not about conducting an interrogation or manipulation – it is a compassionate, consultative diagnosis of the client’s true opportunities and challenges. Most importantly, it requires a willingness to take a stand for your client in the middle of this tension.

The problem for many coaches is that we yearn for the client to like us. That’s our first problem – and actually the root of many of our sales problems. So if we raise the client’s tension level and see them become uncomfortable, we start to feel uncomfortable. We want them to like us, so we diffuse the tension rather than allowing it to magnify. Yet this is exactly the opposite of what needs to occur to help the client step into their bigger vision for themselves.

Not only does this not allow the client to get really clear on their current reality, it also diminishes you as a coach. Deep down, clients do not want a coach who goes easy on them. They want a coach who brings out the best in them, even if they have to experience difficultly in the process.

So for my readers who are coaches and consultants, the biggest issue to master is yourself. How masterfully can you raise the client’s tension level? What goes on inside of you when you start to feel this tension? Do you try to diffuse it and run back to safety, or do you allow it to unfold and hold that tension for the client to see?  When you learn how to master this part of the process, you step up into a much greater level of service to your clients. While it may be unpleasant for the client right now, they will thank you for helping them make the breakthrough.